A Cruel Irony

I have mentioned many times that, while I will always have a special place in my heart for the modern Pagan community and their boundless open-mindedness and love of all things quirky, I have trouble identifying with most of them in regards to how I live day to day, as well as my views on what constitutes proper personal behaviour. From what I understand, this is not unusual among reconstructionists of all types. Our longing for tradition and cultural authenticity can often translate into a more old-fashioned, dare I say, conservative, sensibility. While acceptance of our religious practices as a valid, personal relationship to Divinity is highest in the Pagan community (though there will always be those in any group who think way too much of themselves and feel they have a right to tell others how to worship), we often do not share with them common views on moral issues. Many Reconstructionists of all flavors, Celtic, Hellenic, Norse, and others, hold stricter standards in regards to modesty of dress and sexual behavior than our eclectic Pagan and Wiccan friends. It has been my experience that this does not usually lead to a blanket condemnation of others on the part of the Recons, but simply is a distinction we feel we must point out to avoid confusion. It is difficult enough nowadays when even the most diverse Pagan gatherings overwhelmingly cater to Wiccans and magickal people (don't even get me started on the difference between Paganism and magick!) without having to be 1.) homogenized by outsiders and lumped in with other Pagans as "all the same," and 2.) being excluded by other Pagans who do not understand Reconstructionism as "not real Pagans."

I find it a strange position to be in, a sort of cultural limbo. I worship the Greek Pantheon, accept science as objective truth, and respect the rights of all people to have their own personal relationship with Divinity that does not infringe on the rights of others to do the same. In these respects, I fit in quite well with the Pagans. At the same time, I advocate modest dress, am very much pro-life (this extends beyond abortion to an anti-war and anti-death penalty viewpoint, as well as a belief in social justice and the importance of education and opportunity for all people) and see sex as first and foremost procreative (though it is nonetheless a very pleasurable activity in and of itself, and a great gift of the Gods to humankind!). In these respects, I am very much in line with the moral notions of the Abrahamic faiths, particularly Catholicism. The only real difference is in my views on homosexuality and the right of gay and lesbian couples to marry. I do not see any problem with homosexual couples having the same legal rights as heterosexual ones, and I do not buy into the notion that them having these rights in any way infringes on the rights of anyone else. I also do not see homosexuality as harmful in and of itself. Beyond that, my moral and ethical views are nearly indistinguishable from your average Christian, if you do not include those that see simply being Christian as a moral imperative. Frankly, I try to forget those people exist, because assigning a moral imperative to being of a certain faith is about the most evil thing I can imagine, and often has much more to do with exerting political, economic, and even psychological control than with a concern for the souls or moral integrity of others!

This is a very difficult space to occupy, and it is really quite ironic. Those that I share the most in common in my ethical views are those most likely to believe I am an immoral, evil person before they even get to know me, simply because my morality does not stem from a common religious belief! In practical, day-to-day terms, this irony has isolated me from many friends and family members, and has resulted in my developing a knee-jerk defensiveness that can often come off as hostile, even when I do not mean it to be. I feel like I am barking in the dark, screaming to Christians and Pagans alike, "We are not so different that we can't find enough common ground to live together, maybe even like each other! Is this so fucking difficult to understand!?" But, more often than not, all they hear is noise...